Wednesday, 12 October 2016 11:29

Saying good-bye, letting go and creating with chaos

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My house was built in 1910 and an archway of lilacs covers the front entryway. Every spring, the lilacs bloom and create a beautiful canopy over my front entrance and step. It is one of the things that attracted me to my home.


Four days ago, the first snowfall of the season arrived and the yard and trees were covered with crisp clear wet snow. Everything looked fresh and new and dusted in possibilities.
I awoke to a yard filled with snow and trees humbled by the weight of it all.
I didn’t notice the lilacs in the front yard until I headed out for work. Two large branches lay on the snow-dusted ground; broken and submerged in heavy wet snow. I looked up at the lilac archway; the entire bush was a weighted down canopy of heavy wet snow. Everything was bowing down to the power of this great element — snow. It looked as if the leaves and branches were dipped in crystallized rock candy.
I did what I could to “ease” the weight and burden of the snow. I tried to rescue the tree by shaking and brushing the heavy rock candy snow off of the branches and leaves. I noticed an entire stock of the bush uprooted itself and surrendered to the ground. From trunk to tip the lilac bush lost an entire limb. The snow was too heavy. The leaves and branches were completely weighted down. They stopped struggling and let go. Even the earth surrendered; the trunk let go from the very core of its being.
I started to cry. This lilac bush is more than 100 years old. It has canopied my head and sheltered many other families over the years. Yes, there are other parts of the lilac bush still standing and yet the bush is no longer the same. It has lost part of itself.
There have been times when I too was like the lilac bush in the heavy snow. Trying to push, hold myself up, resist the elements. And yet what ease appears when we stop fighting and pushing, and allow the snow to come — for it will — and then choose. We are never stuck, unless we stop making choices.
Some of the branches chose to let go and surrendered completely. Others chose to allow the snow to weigh her down and still stand strong. Both are possible and so much more.
As humans we hold on to things.
We hold on to stuff, to stories, to memories, to rightness, to “he-said, she-said.” We hold on to old hurts and old blessings, we hold on to everything. Some of the things we hold on to can be like heavy snow and weigh us down and make it hard to move and grow. What could be possible if we allowed ourselves to surrender, to stop fighting, and allowed the current happenings to create new possibilities and choices in our lives?
We can make new choices. We don’t have to be “the same”. We can choose to stand tall and strong in a sea of whirling snow. We can choose to let go and soften into releasing; let the snow come and go and then dust ourselves off and make another choice.
We can get disappointed when we fail, when we fall, when things don’t turn out the way we hoped. We can get mad, sad, upset, angry, jealous and so much more. We can stay stuck in the past. We can cling to the expectations of how we want things to be and how we want things to show up. And when new things arrive we can resist and refuse them.
I love the lilac bush that graces my front door. She makes me feel welcomed every time I come home.
Yet I weep with the loss of the branches.
I will miss her. Yet, what else is possible?
What new light will enter my front room now that some of the branches are gone?
What new opportunities for growth will emerge with this nature-infused space clearing? Things change. We change. All of the time. What if we chose to move through change with ease, joy and glory?
What if chaos was the catalyst to create more possibilities in our lives? {Tweetable}
What if this giant dump of snow was the infusion of chaos that the lilac bush, my home and my life truly needed to step into even more possibilities?
I have dusted off the bush. I have pulled the fallen branches away. The one very large fallen branch still lies on the ground covered in snow. She is too heavy for me to move on my own. I am hopeful that when the snow melts I will see if she has totally broken off from the base, or if she wants to grow in new ways.
Until then, I choose to embrace the changes that come to me with ease, joy and glory. I embrace the snow in all of her glory. I allow the seasons to change, my skin to dry, the sky to darken, the earth to freeze, my winter clothes to warm my body, and I choose to step into the possibilities of chaos and creation even more.
Hello chaos through snow and sleet and cold and dark and ice. Hello chaos through windstorms and cold winter nights. I am ready to create with you. I am ready to receive with you. I am ready to be a contribution to you. I wonder what great possibilities we can create together.
Let’s watch.
Like what you’ve read? Desire more? Shine on with Christine — #thejoyguru. One-on-one life coaching, counselling, abundant living guidance and more is available to you. Sign up for my “Be Alive & Shine” newsletter at www.welcometokiva.com. For more tips and tools on how to live abundantly from the inside out, visit me online or join us at KIVA (in the Carmel Mall). You are always welcome. www.welcometo kiva.com. Twitter: @ChristineCiona or Facebook/KIVAsacredstudio.

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